Swimmer Tried To Dictate The Pool’s Speed Limits, But They Ended Up Trapped In A Slow-Motion Nightmare
If you try to control the tide, you just might get stuck in the undertow.
Swimming lanes at a public pool are designed to keep the peace, but that only works if everyone agrees on a set of unspoken rules.
When one swimmer took their authority a little too seriously, they found themselves caught in a current of creative compliance.
Read on for the full story!
The other day, I was at my local pool.
I looked over all the open lanes, searching for an uncrowded lane to do some laps.
Out of the available lanes, one had three people, and another had one.
Like any reasonable person, I hopped into the lane with only a single other person and began to do my laps.
But the other person in the lane wasn’t having it.
On my first lap, I overtook the other person and was told, quite aggressively, that “the fast lane is over there,” while they pointed to the lane with three people in it.
I’m usually a fast swimmer, but the lap I did was average, if not slow.
This person was not okay with me swimming quickly, was very rude in telling me to move to a more crowded lane, and was, in fact, a very slow swimmer.
The swimmer decided to implement a little malicious compliance.
“Well,” I thought to myself, “I’m definitely not moving to a more crowded lane. I guess I should start swimming slower to appease her. I guess since my shoulder really hurts from my competition the other day, and I definitely don’t want to injure it more, I should do some relaxing kicking.”
And that’s exactly what I did.
I did kick.
But they made sure to adjust their pace.
Now, my kick is definitely not fast, but I purposely did it even slower because, obviously, “this is the slow lane.”
My kick was so slow that the person started overtaking me.
I made sure that they suffered.
They tried hard to be as annoying as possible.
I would start when they were very close to the wall to force them to slow down, and I would swim in such a way that they didn’t have enough space to overtake me.
The best thing happened about ten minutes after I started my malicious compliance—two other old-timers jumped into our lane.
Now the malicious compliance got even better.
Now, I started swimming in such a way that I would be next to the old-timers in a way that suggested I was “overtaking” them, but I never seemed to be quite fast enough to actually overtake them.
How unfortunate.
This formed a wall, and I would occasionally look back to see the person stopping every few seconds to avoid running into anyone, looking annoyed every time they had to do so.
Eventually, they got so fed up that they hopped out.
That’s when the swimmer decided to go on a victory lap.
As soon as they did, I started swimming at my normal pace again, making sure that every time I finished a lap, I would make eye contact to further annoy them.
The old-timers weren’t upset that I was swimming faster. In fact, no one who jumped into that lane was.
I hope that person learns their lesson and never aggressively tells anyone they are swimming too fast ever again.
Maybe next time she’ll think twice about making waves at the local pool.
Let’s see what Reddit thought!
Sometimes the pool staff themselves do the heavy lifting when it comes to defining each lane.
Swimmers can also always ask for outside intervention.
This commenter, however, isn’t a fan of this swimmer’s tactics.
If you try to control the tide, you just might get stuck in the undertow.
If you liked that post, check out this story about a customer who insists that their credit card works, and finds out that isn’t the case.
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